The Normal Challenges of Being Family at Big Moments!

There are many parts of life where we are fortunate to be able to sail on blissfully unaware of what might be going on for people. This state of bliss provides a fertile ground where we can set down what it is we wish to do with our lives in terms of career or state of life. It's the romantic phase that most will experience. Without the romantic phase we would never embrace the big things in life that are needed to become family, to take on challenges and to enjoy the amazing potential within ourselves. Romantic notion is the entry point through which we can check out anything for which we might have a nesting passion or desire. Sometimes, once the romantic phase has passed and we see the reality before us we might set down roots or find an exit to a new place of being.

When we find ourselves dealing with dynamics that are far from ideal, we just want to run and get away to a more comfortable space. Sometimes that is necessary and sometimes not possible or right. However, what do we do if in this space of anxiety on a day when the dynamics seem to loom like a dark cloud! During these weeks when First Holy Communion and Confirmation is being celebrated in every parish in the country, family dynamics are pumping with energy of all sorts - some welcome, some dreaded!

It helps to know that a normal family is complex. Every family has great times and times of challenge. The best and worst of dynamics peaks in sight or in anxiety before celebratory family events. It's good to remember that The Waltons and Little House on the Prairie are fictional accounts of family that are cosy desirables! It can help to talk with someone to whom we can be honest about our reality. The freedom in getting older is that the general reality of life for all becomes more visible so that caring about maintaining image matters less.

The best consolation that we have, as Christians, can be found in the Acts of the Apostles in the Bible where we see the followers of Jesus often falling apart as members of their community as they try hard to live the love that is of God! Like us, they succeed and fail in equal measures! They get up and start over many times. As we celebrate the feast of the Ascension this weekend, Jesus promises us the Holy Spirit. Jesus promises us in the Gospel this weekend that he is with us always, to the end of time. In the middle of the angst, God is present in and with us! The first Christians talked and complained! Talk to someone about your reality if it is one that is challenging. The presence of God through the Holy Spirit is found in one another - in our community in daily life. We are gifts for one another!

Cathy Burke
Catechist in the Lucan Partnership of Parishes